Our baby is one month old!!! Time definitely stays still at times, but other times it flies! One thing I learned this week tis to stop overthinking things! I think being a first time parent, and someone who likes to be perfect and have control over things in my life, it is hard to not try to figure it all out and try to master the task at hand, such as parenting. There are SO many articles and blogs and books out there to explain why babies do this and that etc and multiple solutions to multiple questions. But I am learning that babies are simple – i have to try to not overcomplicate things. Babies eat, play and sleep. They cry when they’re hungry, tired or uncomfortable. And the GREATEST fact to learn is…babies cry – that’s what they do. Babies cannot NOT cry – it’s like telling us we can’t talk. Sounds simple and “duh” right, but taking me awhile for this fact to actually penetrate into this thick skull.
Onto this week’s diary: so we were coming out of our growth spurt with Colette from last week. We thought we were in the clear and there was light at the end of the tunnel. But I am becoming aware of the parenting dilemma – just when you thought you get a handle on things, you are proven wrong and the cycle of storms and peace resumes. Ah, the life of a parent – something that cannot be mastered nor controlled – sucks for us Type A or semi-Type A personalities.
She had gone back to her 3 hour schedule during the day and 4 hours at night after the growth spurt. But soon after (day 22) morning, she had a hard time sleeping and one of her nursing sessions went for over an hour (where usually it would be about 30-45minutes total both sides). I read some articles to see what it could be – maybe I have low flow? Maybe she’s still going through growth spurt? How come she’s feeding especially long – is this actually her getting full and before she was not really full but just passing out from feeds? It took me into a world of overthinking – one of my “greatest” attributes. haha. In the end, I have no clue what happened. She went back to her normal nursing times. Maybe it was just a one off?
The chaos flowed into her sleep. Early in the week, she was very sleepy during the day, so she was pretty much nursed to sleep throughout the day. I thought it was okay because they say babies get sleepy after growth spurts. But we paid for it in the night – she didn’t sleep starting in the evening and into the night. Needless to say it was horror for me because i couldn’t sleep. Poor thing went on 3 to 4 hour stents of crying and unable to settle.
We thought we would do CIO but obviously she was unable to soothe herself. The next day, I made sure she stayed up during her wake times as I thought maybe the reason she couldn’t sleep at night was she didn’t have enough wake time during the day. I think that must’ve been the answer because she slept like a baby into the night again. I even overslept a bit and she was okay (4.5hours at one point).
After the chaos and she returned back to more of a norm, we were able to get a baseline of her patterns: for naps, if she cries, the max she cries out for is 30-40min, but usually it’s 15-20 min and most of the time it’s a whimper. I just finished some tummy time with her and she started crying at the end – the clock was still within a 50min window, so i thought it was gas – burped her a bit, put her down and she started crying hard (not her “normal” whimper), so i thought something might be wrong – decided to wait for her to CIO, it only took 15 min for her to fall asleep. So maybe she was just overstimulated/tired during playtime. So now i know that her normal cry when put down is not just whimpering, but can be full blown crying too. And we will stick to evaluating after her typical CIO time.
Colette’s had acne since maybe week 2. We thought it was because we rub our noses on her and snuggle her lots, so we stopped. But as it continued, I thought it was the food I ate. Nothing seemed to work and right now it seems like it’s hit the peak as there are yellow crusties on her forehand. I read up that newborns are easily overheated, and will have acne because of that and because of hormones from mom. I’ve tried changing positions for nursing and it’s helped with alleviating the acne on the sides of her face. Not sure why she has it on her forehead though. Will wait for doctor next week to know what to do.
Week 4 seems like the “hitting the groove” week for me. Though still chaotic, still many unanswered questions and “huh” moments, there is a peace that has come over that just makes you feel like everything will be a-ok and you sort of have a rhythm. Is that like any of you first time moms?
Baby is on a 2.5-3 hour schedule as we start trying to extend her middle of the night feed. The latest edition of Baby Wise say that we can start extending after 4 weeks (i.e. 4 hours uninterrupted sleep at 4 weeks, 5 hours for 5 weeks etc). So her day usually looks like: 7:30, 10:00, 12:30, 3:00, 5:30-6:00, 8:30, 11-11:30, 4-4:30. Give or take 30 minutes early or late each round base on the day she is having. I get her earlier if she’s just having a horrific nap, and let her go later if she’s actually napping through. The goal of this past month is maximizing her nap time as that’s what my husband and I have decided to prioritize even if it throws her schedule off a bit. Wake time is still 30 minutes more after each feeding, and we usually take baths, cut her nails, change her diaper and outfits since she spits up on herself multiple times per day, socialize together and play with some toys that she doesn’t seem all that interest in 😉 huzzah for a happy adventurous first month!